


The One with the Proposal

by lovetheinsane



Category: Friends (TV), Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Established Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, John is a Bit Not Good, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Romance, Romantic Comedy, SORTA?? it has elements from FRIENDS, Screenplay/Script Format, Sitcom, friends crossover, sitcom!lock, these tags are getting out of hand
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-13
Updated: 2016-12-13
Packaged: 2018-09-08 08:05:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8836852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovetheinsane/pseuds/lovetheinsane
Summary: John: *giggles* Not bored now, are you?[Sherlock makes a face that is both amusement and annoyance.]Sherlock: Well…[John swats playfully at him.]





	

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this awhile back, when I had plans to create a whole sitcom!lock series based on various F.R.I.E.N.D.S. episodes but it sat there, in paper, for a long while. I’m finally putting it up, but I doubt it’ll ever be a full series now that I’m in uni. Still, I enjoyed writing this and I hope you do too! 
> 
> Sort-of beta'd by
> 
>  
> 
> [my friend ant5b](http://archiveofourown.org/users/ant5b/pseuds/ant5b)
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks for the encouragement!  
> And thank YOU for reading.

[Upbeat pop version of the “Sherlock” theme plays along with this season’s opening credits. The show officially opens with an outside shot of 221B and pans inside through the window. We see the flat, the mess in the kitchen, and the sitting room. The camera stops with a view of Sherlock and John on the couch. Sherlock and John are snuggled up on the couch, slowly making out. Sherlock has his back to the sofa, with John in front of him. John’s arms are around Sherlock’s waist, while the detective’s arms are around John’s neck. When they pull away they are both smiling like idiots.]

John: *giggles* Not bored now, are you?

[Sherlock makes a face that is both amusement and annoyance.]

Sherlock: Well…

[John swats playfully at him.]

Sherlock: Well, John, I don’t feel like you’re putting enough effort into keeping me amused. *grins wickedly*

John: *returning the smile* [He shifts closer to Sherlock.] Oh, really? I’ll teach you amused then.

[John rolls atop of Sherlock. He’s pinning his boyfriend with mock seriousness.]

John: Amused?

[Sherlock chuckles and moves his hands so they rest on John’s bottom.]

Sherlock: *chuckling* Getting there.

John: Good.

Sherlock: Good. *smiles softly*

[They both gaze at each other for a few moments before John dips his head and Sherlock tips up to meet him. They start off kissing slowly and sweetly, but within a few moments it starts to get heated. John starts kissing Sherlock’s neck.]

Sherlock: *in between breathes* Definitely NOT bored now.

[John chuckles. They continue kissing passionately, and things seem to be escalating when the door slams open.]

Mrs. Hudson: *cheerily* Woo hoo!

[She stops at the doorway.] Oh! Boys!

[Sherlock and John have frozen in place. Mrs. Hudson seems embarrassed about walking in on them, but she doesn’t join them in their imitation of statues. Instead she tries to stop Mr. and Mrs. Holmes, oblivious to the situation, from following her inside. She doesn’t succeed.]

Mrs. Holmes: *excitedly and as a greeting* Oh, boys!

[She eagerly passes Mrs. Hudson, but then freezes at the sight on the couch. Mr. Holmes is right behind her, and softly bumps into her at her sudden stop.]

Mr. Holmes: Oh, my.

[Mrs. Hudson flaps her hands in embarrassment. Mrs. Holmes recovers, walking toward the couch and simply shakes her head lightly.]

 Mrs. Holmes: Oh, William.

[John, by now, has turned so red the writers can’t think of an analogy. He tries to get off Sherlock as quickly as he can, but his foot catches on Sherlock’s dressing gown, and he falls face first to the floor.]

Sherlock: [sitting up quickly] John!

Mr. Holmes, Mrs. Holmes, and Mrs. Hudson: * gasp collectively*

[John is lying on the ground as if defeated. He groans softly before the screen goes to black, and the show cuts to commercials.]

~~~ 

 

[Once back, the audience gets another view of the inside of 221B before panning to the living room once again. This time around Sherlock and John are sitting on the couch. John’s face is still red, and he’s holding an icepack to his nose. Sherlock keeps stealing worried glances in his direction, and annoyed glares at his parents. Mr. and Mrs. Holmes are sitting on each of the boys’ chairs. Mrs. Hudson enters from the kitchen carrying a tea tray and biscuits.]

Mrs. Holmes: (trying to break the awkward silence) How’s the nose dear?

John: Fine. *chuckles* Just a bit…sore.

Mr. Holmes: I imagine. Sorry about that scare. If we would have known-

John: (smiling) Don’t worry about it. I-

Sherlock: *with sass* In order to avoid any future injuries, I encourage you two to call before coming over. Or maybe don’t come at all. Showing up unannounced makes you susceptible to walking in on us. Who knows? Maybe next time you’ll walking in to me and John fu—

John: *outraged and red* SHERLOCK!!!

[Sherlock, annoyed, snaps his mouth shut. Mrs. Holmes smirks, amused with the whole thing. Meanwhile, Mrs. Husdon has been serving tea to the guests and ignoring Sherlock’s sulk.]

Mrs. Hudson: (handing Mrs. Holmes her cuppa) Oh, I meant to ask dear! What brings you two into town? Any special occasion?

Mrs. Holmes: Oh, yes. We’re going to watch “Richard III”. Mycroft, got us some tickets for our anniversary.

[Mrs. Holmes smiles at her husband fondly and he returns the smile. He takes a sip of his own tea.]

Mr. Holmes: We had time to spare so we figured we might as well drop in and surprise these two.

Mrs. Holmes: *laughing* And surprise them, we did.

[Everyone laughs, except Sherlock. Well, he tries not to laugh, but a small smile breaks through.]

John: I have never asked Violet, but how long have you two been married?

[Mrs. Holmes open her mouth to reply, but Sherlock, still being a sulky brat, speaks before she can.]

Sherlock: Let’s not start that conversation, John, or we’ll be here well into the evening.

John: Sherlock!

[Mrs. Holmes smiles cunningly. She knows her son well. By this point Mrs. Hudson has sat down next to Sherlock and John on the couch.]

Mrs. Holmes: [Sipping on her tea, casually] So, when are you two getting married?

[In his shock, John presses the icepack to his nose a bit too hard, and winces. Sherlock glares at his mother.]

John: *sputters* M-married?

Mrs. Hudson: (waving her hands excitedly) Oh, yes! I’ve been telling these two that they need to tie the knot for ages!

[She puts her hand on Sherlock’s thigh as John puts the icepack down. He seriously looks bewildered by the question.]

John: Married?! Us?

John: Married?!

[Sherlock has gone from glaring at is mom to looking at John. The hurt in his eyes is obvious.]

Sherlock: *with obvious and dramatic hurt in his voice* Well, John. I had no idea that the idea of marrying me was so ridiculous to you, you can’t even form full sentences when thinking about it.

[Sherlock gets up in a huff—knocking Mrs. Hudson’s hand off his thigh rather harshly. He walks right over the table, and stalks off into their room without sparing anyone another look. John stares at Sherlock’s retreating figure—unsure about anything that has just happened. The door slams.]

Mrs. Hudson: Oh, dear.

[There is a palpable silence. The screen cuts to black before going to commercials.]

~~~

[This time the show simply returns with a close-up of John’s bewildered face. He stays like that for a few seconds before standing up quickly. But once standing, he freezes again. He’s not exactly sure what to do, so he looks to Sherlock’s parents for assistance.]

Mrs. Holmes: *sipping tea as if she wasn’t the cause of the current situation* You should probably go to him, dear.

[Mr. Holmes nods in agreement.]

John: Right.

[He hesitates again.]

Umm…

[slowly places icepack on the table]

Right, umm..

Mrs. Hudson: Go, on now.

[John sighs and slowly walks to their bedroom. Mrs. Hudson and Mrs. Holmes resume their chat about anniversaries and fond wedding memories. Their soft chatter can be heard as John stands at the door to said bedroom—weighing his options, and choosing his words wisely—before opening the door. He stands there, awkwardly, obviously wanting to comfort his boyfriend, but also wary of antagonizing him any further. Sherlock is lying on their bed, face smashed into the pillows. The room is dark.]

Sherlock: *muffled* Either shut the door or get out.

 [John silently shuts the door. His posture is tense, and he keeps clenching and unclenching his hands. Sherlock doesn’t make an effort to move.]

John: *clears his throat* You know w- Your parents are still out there…

[Sherlock rolls over, rolling his eyes as he does.]

Sherlock: Obviously, John. I can still hear them.

John: Right.

[He licks his lips. There are a few beats of silence, but John breaks them by walking over to sit at the edge of the bed. Immediately, Sherlock rolls over to his previous position.]

John: Sherlock? C’mon, Sherlock!

[John gently rubs Sherlock’s leg, and although he does seem to relax a bit, Sherlock doesn’t say anything. They stay like that for a few moments. The sound of dishes clanking comes from the kitchen, along with more light chatter.]

John: *clearing throat* I’m sorry, love… *clears it again* About the way I reacted. That was a bit, not good.

[Sherlock sighs softly and rolls over. He looks at John, unsure, but he lets the doctor continue.]

John: *sighs* If you must know…that. Sherlock, I didn’t mean it the way it sounded. I mean, I DO want to marry you… I mean, I would… I mean..

[John sighs and scrunches his face. Sherlock gives John a questioning look.]

Sherlock: What _do_ you mean, John?

[John smiles a bit and resumes rubbing Sherlock’s leg.]

John: I mean, she surprised me, that’s all. It’s just. Well, you know…

[Sherlock sits up and places his hand atop John’s.]

Sherlock: I do.

[They sit like that for a bit, then John starts chuckling. Sherlock gives him a curious look.]

John: You mom took the fun out of proposing, don’t you think?

[Sherlock finally laughs and both John and the audience join him. John’s grin is so bright, Sherlock can’t help but mirror it.]

Sherlock: Proposing? Proposing is boring.

 [Both men lean in for a kiss, and when their lips meet there is a noticeable change in the atmosphere. Sherlock and John kiss softly, for a few seconds before John unwillingly stops and pulls back slowly.]

John: We should get back out there…

[Sherlock kisses his cheek.]

Sherlock: We really should.

[Another kiss.]

John: Ahem. We should go out there, love. We do have some news to share after all.

[Sherlock has begun kissing under John’s jaw. John is obviously enjoying it.]

Sherlock: We do.

[Another kiss. This time much slower.]

John: *nervous giggle* And…we wouldn’t want to worry them.

[Kiss.]

Sherlock: *holding back a smirk* We really wouldn’t.

[He moves down to nibble at the doctor’s collarbone.]

John: Oh, what the hell.

[John gives in and rolls atop a chuckling, delighted Sherlock. The scene closes with the sight of John leaning in for another kiss. Cut to back and then a short commercial break begins.]

~~~

[When the show returns the credits roll. Mrs. Hudson, Mr. Holmes, and Mrs. Hudson are milling about in the living room.]

Mr. Holmes: You know, they’ve been quiet for quite a while.

Mrs. Holmes: They have. I’d expect a bit more noise. I should check on them.

[She puts her plate down, and makes her way to the main bedroom. Mrs. Hudson offers Mr. Holmes another biscuit in the background. Mrs. Holmes is heard opening the bedroom door with a thud.]

Mrs. Holmes: Oh! Boys!!!

[There’s a loud thud, followed by an extended groan. The show ends.]

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> Kudos and comments may inspire me to write like this once again ;)
> 
> ps. The fact that I chose "Richard III" as the play means I wrote this almost two years ago.


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